Oh, Jenna Marbles!
You are the funniest, most ridiculous person I have ever come across on this magical realm they call the Internet – and that’s coming from someone who spends a good (perhaps sad, even) portion of their life surfing the web. With each and every post, you have me laughing so hard that the members of my household become concerned for my general wellbeing and sanity.
Jenna, you have taught me more about life than my own blood-related parents. If not for your weekly YouTube postings, I would have no idea what boys do in the shower. I would have no idea how to carve a pumpkin like Miley Cyrus, nor how to decode a text message. I would be lost without your suggestions of things to do instead of cleaning my room, or without your accurate explanation of how diets work. I would certainly have no idea what a girl’s make-up means, let alone her hair or choice of underwear. You are my idol, my teacher, and my greatest source of weekly inspiration.
You have taught me how to trick people into thinking I’m ridiculously good-looking, and how to do my make-up when I’m drunk to the point of being unable to see myself in a perfectly clean and reflective mirror. Thanks to you, Jenna, I am aware that all us white girls in the club are just the same.
Jenna Marbles, you rock my cotton socks.