I have had a seriously productive day, which is most surprising as today is Sunday. For me (and probably you too), usual Sundays are spent dozing on the couch, watching complete seasons of The OC, and eating junk…but not this one! I’ve managed to tick about three thousand items off my To Do List, the simple reason being that I didn’t go out last night. And what a superb night in it was! Here are ten good reasons to stay in next Saturday night (and maybe all the Saturday nights after):
1. Save Your Money
Perhaps I have less self-control than your average person, but Saturday nights out send my weekly budget into a serious state of turmoil, without fail. (Who am I kidding – I’m not organised enough to budget). Isn’t that $100+ spent drinking and taxi-riding better off going towards new shoes? Or groceries for the week? Or…charity? Yes, it is.
2. Save Your Liver
Much like my budget, Saturday nights out send my poor liver into a serious state of turmoil (again, without fail). Admit it, your liver hates you too. So give him a break this Saturday night! Drink a yummy glass of water (with a squeeze of lemon), and let Little Liver Man know how much you love him.
3. Take Advantage Of Your Empty House
Being a Saturday night, your family/housemates are out and about (getting drunk and spending money – shame!). Celebrate this rare occurrence by taking off your pants, cranking Billy Jean and moon-walking the shit out of your kitchen tiles.
4. Save An Outfit
That awesome dress you’ve been hanging out to wear? Save it for something bigger and better.
5. Pamper Yourself
Spend the night exfoliating, moisturising, face-masking, plucking, bejazzling, whatever! It’s been a long week – you deserve it.
6. You’ve Got No Time For Vomit
No, I’m not accusing you of being the vomitter (although we’ve all been there). I’m accusing your immature friend(s) who have not yet learned their alcohol-intake level. I now know you well enough to know that you don’t wish to spend another Saturday night cleaning up your friend’s vomit, or holding back her hair extensions while she chucks up raspberry coloured gloop. You’ve done enough – it’s time she learnt her lesson.
7. You’ve Got No Time For Crying Bitches
Again, we all have that friend who spends the night crying because the love of her life (whom she met that night) has had someone else tickle his pickle. Don’t feel bad – your not being there will make her a better, stronger person.
8. Avoid Embarrassment
Whether it’s stacking down the stairs, spilling wine down your front or telling someone how bad their face is, do your dignity a favour and protect it. How good does it sound to wake up and not have to worry about the awkward text-messages you sent, or the numerous booty calls you attempted to make? Exactly.
9. Give Your Poor Feet A Rest
No one enjoys the searing pain of wearing killer heels all night, or waking up the next day being unable to stand. Put on your ugliest, comfiest slippers and put your feet up!
10. Enjoy Your Sunday
Take it from me. There is nothing better in this world than a hangover free Sunday. Wake up, go for a run, do your homework…or just wake up and celebrate the fact that you don’t have a hangover.
Now, I don’t know about you, but I may never go out on a Saturday night again.